Anyone above the age of 30 or near, has probably heard the theory that a woman has gone through a breakup when she steps out rocking a spicy short cut or a drastic color change, when a week before she sported long, dark tresses.

Sure she has – what other justifiable reason would a woman full of confidence, self-love, adventure and healthy self-esteem have to reinvent her look other than a broken heart?

He has pretended to love her until the end of time only to change his mind and her heartbreak has now overwhelmed her to the point where the perfect new hairstyle will not only make her feel more beautiful, but help her get over the hurt, make him do a double take the next time he sees her, and, of course catapult her mending?

Get the heck out of here with that foolishness!

Seriously ladies and gentlemen, you could not have honestly thought that I would waste an entire writing space on how unfortunate relationships is the reason women change their hair, right?

Okay, good – I’m really glad you weren’t thinking that. I do not want you thinking I was taking you back to the time Angela Bassett’s character, Bernadine, on Waiting to Exhale (1995) is how women come to the conclusion to do something new to their hair. Do you remember the scene?

Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s really chat about women switching up their hairstyles to declare change and marking milestones in their lives.

When I was a middle school student, my mother was quite stern about what I could or could not do with my hair. It was fairly lengthy, much like hers – and for years, my trips to the hair salon were mandated with a good shampoo, deep conditioning and pressing from the one and only, Mrs. Mooney, who had an extended space behind her home that she operated a salon out of in 3rd Ward, TX (I do realize that anyone not from Houston or surrounding southern states may not know that this is not an actual city, but a historic neighborhood…ha-ha).

I showed tenacity about the hair conversation in my mom’s house because I believed that I was growing up and the whole pressed hair regiment was getting old, more importantly, outdated in my pre-teen opinion.

A Change of Heart

Then, one day, while nearing the end of my 8th grade school year and approaching my 14th birthday, I pitched to my mom that I was not only about to be a second year teenager, but I was going to high school in a few months and a press was not what was up!

My argument worked, but not without its setbacks. I wish you all could have seen the very narrow portion she allowed me to get cut at the top. It was like a double-indented bang, unbelievable.

It was a waste of a salon visit, but I was steadfast.  By the time I hit the doors my freshman year, my hair was properly cut short at the top and long in the back. For me, it meant that I was really a teenager thus no longer rocking a ponytail full of hair straightened by Mrs. Mooney’s pressing comb.

I actually wore that do for the next two and half years of high school and the only thing that might have changed was the color. By the time I was a senior, the top had grown long enough to cut my entire crown into a bob that hung just below my jaw bone. Why? Because it was my prom, marking the completion of my senior year. I was no longer just a teenager, I was more like a young lady.

In spring 2013, I recall getting a major change up. I had the remaining relaxer chopped off of my hair and that for me was the defining phase of my natural hair journey.

Now I did have some highlights so I guess it was not completely natural for those who are technical about it, but I had entered a new space of embracing the original attributes of me and wanted to focus in on that. That was the shortest I have ever worn my hair, but truthfully it’s one of my favorite hair moments. That short hair was flat ironed straight, strategically draped on the nape of my neck and layered to perfection.

I was BRAND NEW, honey!

A Reason for the Season

The women in my life have also used the art of hair #xpression to declare a refined or new season in their lives whether it was a promotion, the accomplishment of a degree, finally getting that Real Estate license, birthday milestone or simply because they wanted to try something new.

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My grandmother had fine, curly hair. In her hey day she’d cut it every summer. That was her thing and besides, she knew by winter it would be at its natural length again.

Now, surprisingly enough, studies have actually been conducted to answer the question of “why women change their hair.”

My burning question is…

Why does it matter?

I mean, no one is asking why men have a lavish assortment of Jordan’s, right?

Truthfully it’s not that deep, a lady just wants to try something new occasionally. But since others may still be very curious about this, I took it upon myself to google around to see what answers different from mine might appear, in no particular order, and I did not include every single result.

Here are the top 5 reasons:

1. Keeping up with fashions and trends
2. Going gray
3. Before or after having a child
4. Out of boredom
5. An effort to solve all problems

Some of the reasons I found definitely cracked me up especially, “an effort to solve all your problems.”

I would like to believe that we don’t think that at all!

Now I regret to share with you all that the majority of the links showing results included, “recent breakup” as the very first reason on the list.

What on earth is this world coming to when a woman can’t change her hair without folks assuming that she has broken up with someone?

I digress!

It all sums up to this one reason – we don’t need a real reason to show up at the next event with an exceptionally different look, just know that if we do, we’re on a new adventure.

Shout out to the every lady who has a hair appointment coming up that’s about to change your entire attitude, muwah!

I want to hear from you – share a particular reason why you decide(d) to change your hairstyle or color? Please be completely transparent as this is A freedom forum.